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The Delicate Art of Revenge Dressing

What to wear when you’re ready to show them who’s boss.

By Caitlin Abber

I think every woman has a revenge fantasy floating around in her head. Maybe it’s revenge on a cheating ex, a colleague who threw her under the bus, or an entire system that has told her she’s less than, but we’ve all got an over-the-top plot we’ve painstakingly scripted, usually featuring killer heels or combat boots (depending on the woman and the type of revenge), a getaway car, and a soundtrack by Rihanna. Of course, most of us don’t act on these fantasies, but still…just picturing them, over and over (and over) again is incredibly delicious. 

Right now, my revenge fantasy involves getting revenge on the last year. When the pandemic is over, I am going to have a schedule so packed with social engagements, people are going to wonder if there are two of me (“There’s no way Caitlin could make it to all of these parties in one night!”). Other than seeing other people in person, my favorite part of the fantasy is what I’m going to wear (and burning all of my non-cashmere sweatpants in a fire pit). The outfits—my god—they are going to be bananas

Here are just a few of the looks I’m putting on my vision board (modeled by our Customer Communications Associate, Emma).

A Sexy Dress and a Pair of Heels

I was pregnant the year before the pandemic and spent most of 2020 postpartum (on top of being totally isolated). That’s two years of not feeling my sexiest, nevermind having a reason to put on a curve-hugging frock. But you better believe that the first chance I get, I am shaving my legs and hopping into the James or Annie dress, the Ella sandals, and the Jensen trench for a big reveal. I want pre-dinner cocktails, a 2-hour sit-down meal, dancing, and a long cab ride home. Is that too much to ask?

A Pencil Skirt and Some Skin

Some people are speculating that when we return to offices, all rules about dressing for work will have drastically changed. But I think, rather than showing up in hoodies and yoga pants, people might go in the opposite direction and start dressing up—I mean, really dressing up. At least that’s my plan! Next time I see my coworkers in the flesh, I am going to look like a mix of Emily Blunt’s character from The Devil Wears Prada and Sandy at the very end of Grease (aka, Bad Sandy). Catch me in a pencil skirt, like the Cortlandt or Greenpoint, and a shoulder-revealing top, like the Dae or Rivers. I plan on bringing so much glam to the office, they’ll forget all about my sloppy days on Zoom.

A Blazer and Not-Quite-Leggings

I love my friends. Whether it’s been over the phone, text, or Instagram, they have made me feel so much less alone this past year. So when I can finally see them all in person, it’s going to be…extreme. All that hugging and crying is going to make us hungry, and I imagine we’ll head out to a restaurant (!) for a meal (!). What to wear to such a momentous event? Tight black pants, as a nod to the leggings that got me through the last year, a breezy tank, like the Vicky or Peggy top, and a blazer, like the Gaia or Hoffman, because damn, I’ve missed those. This is an outfit that can last all day and even to karaoke, which is probably (no, definitely), where we’ll end up.

Caitlin Abber

Written By

Caitlin Abber

Caitlin Abber is the Brand Editor at M.M. LaFleur, and an award-winning writer and content creator. Over the last decade she has held senior editorial positions at MTV, Women's Health, Public Radio International, and Bustle, and has bylines at InStyle and OprahMag.com.

See more of Caitlin's articles

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